From this Moment on..

A special one..

2011-01-01T11:20:00.000-08:00

Is it just me.. or does anyone else too feel this song has some magic in it... Still ! Especially the female portions sung by Shreya Ghoshal. Upteenth time that I am listening to this masterpiece by Rahman..and everytime, it just carries me to this special place deep within me, where perhaps love dwells unblemished..

Such a simple piece of music, such simple words.. but yet, what a mesmerizing backlash it leaves me in !

Last Summer - Part 2

2011-01-01T10:46:00.000-08:00

My Diary: Summer of 2020...

I had always thought, that the hardest thing I ever did was to let you go .... until this day, when years down the road, I had to walk past you and pretend not to know you...

-Meera.

Hmmm....

2010-11-19T18:35:00.000-08:00

Something is fatally wrong with me... Or it could be that I have come to terms with my long term boy friend Mr. Laziness and we've finally decided to live-in together!! Yes, whatever it is I am gripped by this insane feeling of feeling nothing towards anything! How else would you describe this.. Normally I would've, by now, made a list of things-to-do on such a beautiful friday evening ..a list of my fav things .. which typically goes like this .. dust up some old dvds out of the box and spent a good 20 minutes trying to decide on which one to start with before I finally flip-in the same old comedy hit of the 80's, the one I know every single dialogue of.. grab a book, which I always know I would not go beyond the 20th page, (Jeez.... what's with me and the number 20!) and settle into the comfort of my green fat cushion snuggling under the warm blanket, sipping the yummy strawberry smoothie I made.. Ha! Sheer bliss!

And now, I don't feel like doing any of these! I absolutely hate the idea of hanging out with friends which would have been second in the list after all of that above!

I dread the thought of shopping, which I always considered was what I actually got married to before my husband came along!

SIGH

So with that note, I am gonna go for a deeper introspection of whatever frenzy has posessed me and hopefully, I would fall back in place, sometime soon. Wish me luck!

A flickr..

2010-08-20T18:06:00.000-07:00

What’s your word? What is that single word that defines you..that identifies the most part of you?

Well, it’s not me who asks this.. But if you have read (or rather seen) Elizabeth Gilbert’s “Eat Pray Love” you would know what I am talking about.

A li’l late, but I’ve finally laid my hands on this book.. And guess what! I am absolutely loving it!! Its only an absolute proof of how much this book has enthralled me that though only half way thru, I have by now, at least a zillion times, whispered “I understand, I’ve been there” ! (to Liz)

This other question I quoted, - a word that defines me, has left me in anguish throughout the day, while I scour through innumerable words, one of which would probably be me! As Liz rightly said, I know a lot many words that “I am not” but the one word that I am, is still out there somewhere waiting to be unleashed! But I’m only half way through, remember? So I will, hopefully, stumble upon it .. ....... soon!

And when sometimes, one or the other of my friends turn out to be a sweetheart and gift me BOOKS, though they, the books, find a very special place in my heart, they do not often accomplish the one purpose of their sheer existence - to be read! But this one- Pats, I love you more for rekindling my energy, and by the time I am done, (I still donno how the book would end but hopefully) I would end up falling in love, yet again, with this “Dolce Vita “ (Sweet life!) and I sure owe you one!

All those in quotes above (“ “) are excerpts from Elizabeth Gilbert’s "Eat Pray Love"!

Dear God.

2010-05-15T20:40:00.000-07:00

I have a strange fondness for reading my Zodiac character chart whenever I come across one.(I am a Geminian btw! ) and by now I know the out-and -out of the entire Geminian traits ! But the next time I find a similar chronicle, I would yet again be snoopy!

And now...

Dear God,

You are looking at the wrong page in ur guidelines manual! You are getting it all wrong with me these days! It ain't matching with the "Gemini Woman " I read just now.. :( (Ok, at least not a few important traits! You obviously know what I am talking about!!)

Please double check! And if you still feel you are right, could you try skipping a few pages??!!!

Anxious,

Karthika

....

2010-04-22T06:51:00.000-07:00

I know this song ..

once my favourite !

I used to sing along..

words streamed without a hitch!

Now, after all these years, I heard it again!

But this time, I couldn't catch up with the words..

Blame it on my memory

Or on my heart,

bleached by the scar the song left in the past!

.......

2010-02-21T17:26:00.000-08:00

Sometimes it’s good to concede to Silence is it?

I think I fear of being judged by the moment!!!

Sleepless....

2010-02-08T19:22:00.000-08:00

I've always dreaded news which come in search of me during the deepest hours of night.. For, one thing, I'm scared of the silence of darkness. Then the revelation by itself, which my sleep would've, by then, paved way to. Followed by the innumerable hours I trifle in my bed, fighting sleep! And when I conquer it finally, there comes the impetuous visitor! Dreams! which then takes over the stage and rambles over whatever is left of my mental stability. Until one of them shudders me awake, only to be unveiled, to the last and the most dreadful moments, when with a pounding heart I search for the reality, Which I guess, by then, would've been lost somewhere, amidst the Sleepless Night!

A late Applaud for Kerala Cafe- The Bridge!

2010-01-17T10:32:00.000-08:00

Its too late to write a review for the movie - Kerala Cafe - This isn't a review at all. I didn't have any preset notions when I sat down to watch the Kerala Cafe.

As they trailed through the stories one after another - slices of life beautifully tied together- I appreciated it for nothing more than the freshness in the concept and also for getting to watch all the versatility of story telling in small packages of cinema.

Until I reached the - Bridge, directed by Anwar Rasheed, starring Salim Kumar, Santhakumari and Kalpana in the lead. A minuscule fragment from the journey of life, the feeling of being lost, abandonment, and yet the hope of finding companionship in every desolation!

Should I say the movie is, Beautiful! Paradigm of directorial and technical excellence, Amazing performance by the cast, Unbelievably powerful narration and lot more..

Or simply that it touched my heart in every possible way a story ever could, each frame scrupulously rendered, each shot so meticulously blended, it felt closer to my heart as it strode through the most heartrending tide of life, and then the ending frame, which left a lump in my throat, a pain in my heart and tears in my eyes.

I just sat there, completely numb!

The movie ended leaving the rest of the story to the viewers imagination or rather to the hope and prayer in our hearts. For the less words that were spoken throughout the story, it struck deep. So deep that my heart would reel under the impact of this story for quite some days!

I wish it rained now.... just to take the edge off my heart a little bit!

Painfully Beautiful ! or Beautifully Painful !

Last Summer....

2010-01-14T21:49:00.000-08:00

As always, Abhay chose this place, this corner table in the secluded part of the 71 Irving Place Coffee Shop, facing the street where the world just passed by. But today, I could not feel the serenity and the warmth of this favorite place of mine, today I could barely hear the soft whispers, the quiet tones and faint laughs around.

Today, its a horribly different day!

I am still trying to catch up with the words he just said. Word by word I hastily repeated it in my heart , still trying to believe its not true..may be ..may be ..I heard it wrong! It can't be so.. he can't, you know , just walk away. There just ..... can't be ........

another girl!!!

I froze. Not knowing how to respond, my thoughts went dizzy.... Suddenly the traffic outside seemed louder, or was it just the thoughts in my head! Shock, perplexity, apprehensions, melancholy and lot more. There was a sudden gush of pain in my heart... a sudden rush of tears in my eyes. But No.. not in front of him. Something in me said, I should not reveal my insecurities to him anymore. That's weird between us! For the first time in all these years that I have known or rather loved him, he felt like a total stranger to me now!

I chose to abide by my heart and so set aside my vulnerabilities for the time being and tried to look composed. It just happened so. I suppose, your inner self, never really wants to let you down and it takes over and makes decisions when it senses you being totally snapped. I should talk now rt, that's what he is expecting me to do now.. Talk what? I collected myself and looked up at him.

Abhay leaned forward in his chair . He lighted another cigarette. He is always like this, when he feels low; tries to hide his anguish and anxieties and sometimes his anger, in these swirls of smoke, one after another, and today he was more than ever!! I felt, he missed that innocence in his face, to which I had lost my heart a hundred times. I sensed his hands trembling and he kept shifting his cigarette between fingers. Trying to look composed. but failed evidently. I sensed that he was barely looking into my eyes, as opposed to the zillion evenings we were here!

"Meera! tell me something.... your silence is killing me! "

His words shook me from the numb coldness ...."Well.. It's..ummm.. ...." I gulped, brewing time as I searched for words......

"Would you like some more coffee, sir", The waiter's voice shook me.
I felt thankful to him for interrupting...
He refilled our coffee without saving it for our nod, and left us with a smile, perhaps wondering, why his otherwise whimsical guests were strangely quiet today.

"I didn't know what to say when my parents said so to me Meera!" He started to speak again- words scented by the cigarette smoke, which I know I once hated, but later on, someday, it ceased to matter anymore.

"I mean, here is this girl, I was madly in love with once! everyone in her family and mine knew we were. And then one fine day, she breaks up with me for no fault of mine! Here she comes, out of the blue, all so apologetic and tells me, she still loves me the way she used to! What should I have told her? I just couldn't find the courage to say - you are no longer there in my heart the way you used to be! I .. I didn't say anything. "

He paused, to take a puff, and stroked his forehead. Eyes, still, more or less wandering away from mine, he is barely used to checking if I am listening. Well, I always did.

"And now, it has gone so far that our families want us to get married. I don't blame them for being happy, for their son got what he once wished so much ..but.. but how do I tell them now, that I am not very sure if I still want it the same way"

I trailed behind all those words he just said and merely looked up at his face hoping to meet his eyes. They always spoke to me more than his words. And more often revealed those he never even said.

For the past 5 years that I've known him, I've grown to predict him so well. Or so I thought! I leaned back in the chair, my eyes still glued to his face, trying to comprehend the varied flashes of emotions. Frames dodged in front of my eyes. I was in love with him! But so was he! How I know? Well, In these 5 years, he knew how I spent every single minute of my life. He was so much part of me. And, his mind like an open book of myriad pages, with words of his thoughts which always made perfect sense to me.

But somewhere, someday, I think, I skipped a page or two.. ......

Being Me... Myself.

2009-12-06T16:14:00.000-08:00

My ipod and my car has reached the rim of its patience with my song list lately. Dittoing their state to mine, I finally sat down today, in search of some fresh air, for them and for myself. Since Rahman seems to be "still - working" on his magic :) I, with a desperate heart, began searching for Malayalam songs. (My ipod still does not hold a significant collection of the - new generation malayalam songs, as you may call it! Oh, don't get me wrong, I am not repellent to malayalam songs, but somehow the new era of those doesn't seem to leave me mesmerized like the melodies of the early 90's do! :( )

Anyways! inspired by (or rather intrusive of) a song which I have been hearing off my husband's laptop these days, I began to frisk every known music site and apparently, this time, a couple of songs got lucky enough to get into my play list and one in particular is what eventually left me writing here.

This was a song from a movie - Madhya venal, sung by K.J Yesudas. The song, I thought, was inspired by the evergreen "oruvattom kudiya pazhaya vidyalaya" which even now, leaves us sailing in nostalgic moments of our own. Well this new song too, ladled the emotions of missing childhood, missing home, teenage.. and its hundred varied colors.. Though the song wasn't captivating enough, it did take me, for a while to a world of my own.

And here I am, travelling back in time.. to those moments I wish I could embrace yet another time.. A few I know is still promising.. and a few now just part of the beautiful bouquet of memories .....like...

- Waking up to my mom's tea..

- Driving in my car .. the rain.. lonely and mystic roads... back in kerala..

- the hot and spicy "Mulakku Bajji" and the beach..

- Lekshmi and her wonderful company I enjoyed

- Hostel life during my engg. and everyday of it.. late night gup-shups, the pranks and the

bustle in the air during the university exams eve!!

- Watching those "don't-use-your-intellect" movies with Lekshmi..

- the hot puri and chicken curry from the Sankhumukham coffee house...

- Early days to office in the bus and binoj.. and the infinite number of movies we talked about..

- first crush at college

- Watching F.R.I.E.N.D.S and X-Files with my sister

- first time I sang on stage ...

- Watching Cricket with Dad...

- 11th and 12th and the wonderful friends I made there -The "Blockbusters" & days of music!

- Waiting at the railway platform - for my train to Kannur, to my parents, during my engg days..

- Niagara - her mist on me..

- Coimbatore and the mixed emotions it brought in me ..

- Mili .... (my doggie)

- Rushing home from school to be on time for MTV Select ...

- Engg combined study with Aswathy.. and yeah, the wonderful friend I have in her!

- Chilli Chicken with chilled Coke, that dad used to buy at times for dinner! Oh So ecstatic!

- The Evening at Marine Drive, Mumbai.

- college lab exams.. the questions written on the other side of the chits, neatly laid on the table and being asked to pick one that decides the fate of the day! Boy! Never was a decision as skeptical as that !!

- Sunday evening movies with hot snacks from mom's cuisine...

- Bunking classes to watch the college cricket tournament..

- The morning bus journey to college during my engg...

- The moment when the New York Skyscrapers unravelled in front of me from the Empire State building!

- Falling in Love, and every day of it ! Those days of sheer bliss!!

The proposal.

2009-08-27T07:31:00.000-07:00

"Should I?!" Priya, still skeptical.

I smiled. "It'll be a "Yes". I know Jai well enough"

Priya raised an eyebrow.

"as ....his...best-friend ofcourse" I was quick! She winked.

That evening, Priya banged my door open "He's been in Love with you since.......forever!!!"

I skipped a heart-beat just as my mobile beeped. "Coffee??? - Jai."

This is my first attempt writing a 55-Fiction! :) A form of nano fiction limited to 55 words.
To know more about 55 Fiction visit http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/55_Fiction. Eager for your remarks!!

Morning Ramblings.

2009-08-24T08:34:00.001-07:00

My time sheet at work has this apart from the regular columns to fill in the efforts you spend over the week: A small text below which says: "How do you feel" and has a drop down with four choices to select from: Excited, Good, Fine, Confused and Discouraged.

Interesting! the page doesn't allow you to submit the time sheet unless you choose one among the four . I wonder what my manager would do with it every week though I try to be sincere in choosing mine.

I wish, I had this option with my life too. Every day morning I wake up and reach for my mobile to switch off the alarm, and then there could be something which would need me to pick an " emoticon for the day" before I could get out of the bed, and I should then be living the day with my choice.

I wouldn't still always pick up "excited" or "happy". Trust me! Well, who wouldn't get bored with routine be it even staying excited every day of the week. Okay , fine! I would ! But at least I know whats in store for the day and emotions won't take me by surprise. And may be I would refine a couple of those options to something like "Peaceful", "Less-Irritated", "Dreamy", "Romantic", "feel-good-about-yourself", "N0-one-would-freek-me-out" , and so on...

Hmm... well then, I do realize, life is not that simple. The bundle of surprise, takes its twists, turns and unravels by itself and Boy! I would have no clue of whats coming. Just as when I think my day is gonna end with a happy emoticon, Bang! there it comes and turns the smiley upside down. Apparently, when life strolls away on a different route than mine, all I could do is either the wild goose chase to pull it back, or, go round the corner and wait for life to rejoin me.

To a stranger...

2009-06-04T09:16:00.000-07:00

I looked at that old woman, a fair lean figure clad in a white saree, at the railway station with a few lottery tickets in her hand. Something about her was so different, so serene. She carried a smile, so peaceful, as she walked in small unsteady steps, from one person to another,extending the lottery ticket in her hand! The nodding heads never let the smile off her. And she never compelled nor complained. She paced slowly with the same gentleness. I wished someone bought a ticket from her, or atleast returned her smile. I don't remember how long I stood staring at her. Talks and laughter of my friends, started fading off. Or perhaps I was barely paying attention. Something about the old woman disturbed me. And before I realized my eyes filling up, there she was ! Right in front of me! I tried not to meet her eyes! I managed a smile, ofcourse not as glorious as hers! And with words I had a tough time gathering, I uttered,

"ticket ka kitna hein naanny? "

"theez rupya beta.. shaayad kuch zyada hee hai ek ticket ke liye.. par yahee tho hein meere paas..
lena chahogi?" She replied, slightly skeptical.

I nodded a yes with a smile. The relief on her face eased my heart.

I sensed the look on my friend's face which , for a moment, I ignored with a smile. I got a 50Rs note from my purse and extended it to her.

"Thoda ruk sakthe ho beta? mere paas change nahin hein. agar tum ruk sakhte ho tho, mein waha se le athi hoon". She said pointing to a public telephone booth at a distance.

"ek minute naanny.. mein dekhthi hoon".. I searched my purse again and found a 10Rs note.

I looked at my friend, who, as if reading my mind, retrieved two 10 Rs notes from her valet.

"Yeh lijeye " I extended the 30Rs to her.

She took the money and gave me the ticket. We exchanged smiles, and as I was about to keep the ticket in my bag, she spoke again.

"Ek minute beta", She held my hand in hers, and closed her eyes for a minute as if uttering a prayer. I stared at the tranquility in her face!

"meine bhi duva kee hein beta, thumhe ye ticket par zaroor prize milegi. sukhi raho! " And she smiled. The moment she said it I could read from her eyes how genuine a blessing that was! Perhaps the most heartfelt blessing I ever had from someone I hardly knew!

I thanked her in a smile and as she slowly walked away, I thought, how much in that 30Rs would she get for herself! And I wondered about the life of such a soul who could pray from her heart for a stranger like me, for the 10Rs she may get!

Sometimes, we are too small in this Big world!

(Based on a true story! I thought perhaps the conversations in Hindi might help doing justice to the emotions I tried to capture if at all I succeeded doing so!)

A SORRY note.

2009-05-12T10:14:00.000-07:00

I know, it would've been miserable for you! Like a lonely lover! Baffled and bustling as to what would have possibly gone wrong and why!

Yeah, we were so good together, I admit. Everything was so perfect! Someone like you is hard to come by. Though it has been just a couple of months, I know how long longing could be! And now that I sound like a lover, let me mend it up with a sorry for leaving you in the middle of our journey together, and a reason, if you may ask, .... hmmmmm... I was busy ! Busy with life as such . Like... you know what happened the other day.... I..

Oh! Hold on! Didn't I wait for a reply ? There I go again, as if you could easily be talked into things!

But let me speak my heart dear Blog, I missed you too.. and there really is nobody else..Trust me!!

Whoohaa! I see that smile on your face.. a smile of giving in to me yet again.. or were you smiling at the predictably unpredictable me! Anyways, I knew you would understand...

yeah..so, as I said ... the other day....

(to be continued... )

What am I thinking now?

2009-03-02T10:15:00.000-08:00

* Its a lazy morning.

* Been quite long since I found a new set of songs for myself.
* I don't have my car today, so can't go out anywhere.
* Apparently, I can't drive today coz I have a relatively big dressing around my hand for the laceration.
* It does slightly hurt now.
* Has the painkiller ceased to work ?
* May be I should take some food.
* By the way, I should start over my diet.
* Will do it from tomorrow.
* OK! will do it from next week.
* Its still a drowsy day!
* Because am tired and I hardly have anything interesting to do!
* Whatz up for the week ahead.
* There isn't any movie releasing this week too.. I mean the hindi ones..
* Delhi 6 was OK I guess..wasn't the climax a little freaky!! I mean,

with all the mess around, the "turnout kalabandar " was a weird idea of abhi's!!!
* But obviously better that if Rakyesh Mehra chose to kill AB in the end

in which case I might have asked for my money back!
* songs were obviously good.. Rahman rocks!! (Again! )
* Genda phool has been repeatedly playing in my car
* not much choice of songs for me these days.. yeah yeah... I know I get bored so easily.
* Oh yeah, my friend is coming over weekend.
* But weekend is still a long way to go.
* I am bored now.
* No! No! dont even think about sleeping.
* May be I should use my time more productively.
* But how?!!!
* I should finish the book today.
* Alright ! Alright! I mean read the book today!
* I should post more often with the amount of time I have in hand.
* Posts like these... Naaahhh...
* But this was an easy one. ;)
* I should really workout more.
* Yesterday was a disaster at the gym.
* I should work out some plans for shopping!! ( Plan!.. yeah coz the stuffs are not for me)
* I wonder when I would finalize on my travel date! Time too is flying!
* May be a couple of movies again over the week!! Revolutionary road was just about fine ..

* Not as much as I expected..

* I should perhaps catch up with the Reader and Benjamin Button this week.
* Am I turning out to be a big time movie bluff these days..
* Whatever!! guess what, I enjoy it more or less.
* Friends and neighbours all seem to be so busy ..
* Or am I the lazy one among the lot?
* oh yes! and its about time I made up with my li'l sister

with whom I had a major clash over the weekend!
* OK ..is this what you call a post!
* Its obviously better than doing nothing!
* perhaps I need to stop.. its getting longer..
* with nothing but absolute nonsense.
* and I yawned right now which isn't a good sign while writing one's blog I tell you!
* so that's it.. Ciao!

Perfect Evening!!! Rahman Wins the Oscar!!

2009-02-22T21:02:00.000-08:00

Rahman brings Home the Oscar! Not just one but Two!!!!!

He performed live on the Oscar Stage!! What a perfect evening for his millions fans around the world!!

CHEERS TO THE MUSIC MAESTRO OF THE ERA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE MAN SIMPLY DESERVES IT!!

Late note ...

2009-02-17T10:03:00.000-08:00

My love is what makes me believe in Miracles... Still.
The whims and realities of life.. One or the other is always a dream I wake up from every morning!
Happy Valentines Day!!

Here's a song i liked recently.. Thanx to one of my friends who send me this..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dhuADk6-y-0&feature=related

ARR wins BAFTA Award! :)

2009-02-09T09:48:00.000-08:00

Yay! Raining Rahman Again!!

Meanwhile I am leashed to his new "Connections" album. Was eagerly waiting to download it (apparently, patience is the last fortitude I have when it comes to his new releases!!)

Soothingly Refreshing is the simple way I would put it. (Jiya se jiya is an exception.. I seem to somehow skip that track as of now! )

My qwk pick from the album would be "Himalaya" . Wow so exquisite! The first time I heard it, was on my car stereo, being a lone traveller down the road in the evening when it silently snowed. The music seemed to sway along and dance, so gentle, and fall in with the frolicsome snow flakes . One of those blissful moments, I Love life!

A "must-hear" would again be the Silent Invocation 1. A meditative track! Close your eyes to this and it would drift you afar from the world around you!!

Of the other tracks, "Mylapore Blues" amazed me with the lovely blend of mridangam and blues. And so did "Mosquito" - interestingly imaginative.

I know these days, like many other Rahmanians perhaps, my posts linger around him and his music. Can't help it! The music leaves me mesmerized and never cease to surprise and delight one after the other!!

Slum Dog Millionaire , Ghajini, Golden Globe, OSCAR, AR Rahman everywhere!!

2009-01-26T07:04:00.000-08:00

Slum Dog Millionaire is on the race.. on an adventurous feat, with 10 Oscar nominations. And 3 nominations for the undoubted Music genius A R Rahman!

Frankly, my inspiration to catch up with the movie at the theatres last weekend was nothing but for AR Rahman!!! Scintillating music ! The story unveiled with the voice of the man himself.. AR Rahman with the title track! What more can you ask! For people like me who simply admire the music maestro! (Hey.. There weren't any titles at the beginning of the movie. I know .. i know.. that sounds weird to be mentioned here! But my point is, we all had to save our usual cheers and applauds till the end as the name AR Rahman showed up on screen.. :D )

Apparently, the movie, by and large, turned out to be appealing to me as well . I loved, the way Boyle's camera skimmed over the gut-wrenching souls of Mumbai. Really Appreciate, a Non-Indian director to capture those miniscule details (a few of those shot with hidden cameras, as revealed by Danny Boyle himself), which perhaps, the native film makers would fail to achieve these days. In the end, I dnt know if I should say it was a "Feel-good" movie, rather deep down I am still searching for that feeling! It seems that a few of those kids who acted in the movie were actually from the slums. I am almost thankful to Boyle, for ending the movie with a Bollywood Dance number, which, if not for anything else, would atleast leave the audience back with the same old fanciful image of our country.

Rahman's music swept in beautifully, enhancing the beauty of many sequences and perhaps soothing the otherwise raw portraits in the movie. He surprised us with the diversity in his songs.. Oh Yeah.. turned my heart into a Popsicle!!

No Marks for guessing the second reason for me watching "Ghajjini" !! Of course Aamir Khan!

The Mr.Perfectionist's eight pack get up was obviously better than King Khan's in OSO :D Aamir and Asin looked charming together. And thanks for the warm and feel-good climax which for me was an icing to the cake.

But apart from anything else, I would be writing about Ghajjini at this belated hour for nothing else but the track "Kaise Mujhe" in the album . The haunting melody which clings on to my heart still. A typical Rahman song which grows with time. And its Shreya magic again!!! I loved the way they brought in the female voice of the song in the climax. The album has a musical version of the song,which again, is simply !WOW! The lyrics have been outstanding too . Even, loved the way certain words where pronounced! I fall in love with this song over and over again .. and madly enough that I asked my friend Durga to teach me to play this one song on her Keyboard!

Yet again, Hats off to Rahman!!!! My sincere wishes and prayers for him at the Oscars! He deserves it in return to the magical music he has rendered through the years!!

I am now humming "Masakkali..Masakkali... " Way to go Rahman Saab!!

A Bouquet of Timeless Memories! Good Bye 2008!

2008-12-31T06:37:00.000-08:00

Sipping my morning coffee, and feeling the chill in the air by the patio, suddenly I realized, oh yeah, its the last day of this year. 2008..Perhaps an year which would remain unfaded in my memories for years to come or may be forever. Frames have already started to flash in front of me.

Earlier this year, It was good to be back home, back with mom after quite sometime.. Perhaps thats when I realized I was so damn home sick! The city was strange in its own ways. One thing I gained for sure, was a few good friends, whom I still cherish and feel happy for having had. They walked me through those days I must say and I would be ever grateful to them for that.

Yes, 2008, for me, was a "returning home", returning to my world of love and laughter.

Days which I longed for, days which were so enduring, that I wished I could pause and never bring to a close, days with love in the air and music all around, days with compassion beyond logic and common sense!!

And yet, a few days which I wished, just did not turn up!

It all went like a tornado wind indeed!

2008, parted my ways with my 13 year old companion. My doggie.. Mili.. Atleast I am glad that I cld be with her in her last moments and do everything I could, for my beloved!

Well, I have a new puppy back home now, Guddu. yet, not as sweet as my Mili ;)

My new car. :) The year brought me this, which I had long wished for myself. A brand new black beauty!! Loved every gesture of hers! I cherish those loong trips and those lovely moments with her.

I got married this year and it indeed had brought a new edge in my life.

Perhaps the longest vacation in my life! 2008, carried me out of the busy life I had, indeed another major change for me!

A few things never changed, friendships, a few, silently made its presence felt through thick and thin. Though at present, I miss watching those "picked-up-no-sense-movies" at the theatres, those "no-destination" drives, the "no-intension-to-buy" shoppings, those "non-materializable" tour plans, and the gossips and gup shups with her, I know the year ahead would still bring me those!

So thats what the year was for me.. A blend of it all.. And as it slowly tip toes away, smiling, I silently wish, it stayed longer. But I know, thats the way life is. No complaints whatsoever. Life a teacher of miraculous lessons and me a dreamer of a better tomorrow!!

Thanks for the lovely moments you gifted me, thanks for the beautiful memories, thanks for the health and well being of my family and friends, thanks for being there in my life. Good Bye! You would forever be marked in the pamphlets of my life!

The silver line at the end, may it bring new hopes, new dreams and a better tomorrow!

Happy new Year!

Mystic Splashes... The Touch of Love!

2008-12-12T15:14:00.001-08:00

It had started raining again. Aditi slowly opened her eyes. She could see the wet window panes from her bed. She watched those splashes of water on the glass. The rain had fogged the glasses. She wished to reach out to those, and run her fingers over them.. but now she could hardly keep her eyes open.. they were miserably paining.. no..not more than a few seconds.. she tried in vain to keep them open a little longer.. her eyes pained..so did her head.. or may me the whole body pained now.... She could feel how strenous it was to breath now.. yet she tried hard to keep her eyes open, for the rain on the window panes. There was a beeping sound in the room. Something was continously beeping.. that was perhaps the only sound.. wished she could mute it, so that she could hear the rain. Could now hardly see anything around. Her vision has started fading off. Aditi shut her eyes tight for a few seconds and tried opening them. cldn't ...but it was still raining... may be she could hear it now ... Yes.. So light.. so eloquent. Could feel the chill.. the soothing presence...

Aditi loved the rain..always!! she opened her eyes again... and this time with ease... There!! Those rain drops on window panes.. or was it on the windscreens.. My car! Aditi's favorite place in the whole world.. Rain had fogged her windscreens and the glasses. She reached out to the window, wiped off a little fog off the window. She smiled at herself as she did that. Managed to have a peep outside. Its raining.. the elegant down pours! She felt an icy chill now. Pulled her coat little closer and tighter.. mmm..better now... Always loved to feel the rain on her.. mmm..but may be not today.. may be because of the fever. Its still sooo chill.. hmmmm..and her head was still aching. how long have i been sleping ? Aditi wondered....Should be a couple of hours by now. She searched for the mobile.. and just as she picked it up, there was a knock at the window pane..

Prem was all drenched in the rain. He hurried inside the car as soon as the door opened.. UUppphhh.. soo chill!!! Shuddered those droplets of water from his shirt. He was trying to catch his breath. Shook is head in a attempt to doff away water from his hair.

Aditi wiped off the droplets of rain from her face and watched him, still not fully out of her sleep.

"Aaadhii!!! How r u feeling now honey .. Better?? ..lemme see.. "

Prem placed his hand on her forehead.. Ooohh .so chill his hand was..!!

"mmmm.. better I must say. Here! Have your tablets.. and u r gonna be fine in some time"

"I dnt want anymore tablets Prem! Am fine now.. just that .. it was soo cold in here.. where have u been soo long.. I just ..perhaps .. over slept.. and may be thats y .. my head still aches.. and.."

Aditi looked tired..

Prem smiled as he slowly pulled closer to her .

Aditi snuggled beside him. She could feel him hug her and the warmth of him hold her tight. He kissed her. Aditi smiled as she looked up at the window "Prem... see its raining .. I love to watch the rain with you... always with you... "

"hmmmmm...... " Prem held her tight and sighed as he watched the rain on the glasses.

" I missed you... " Aditi whispered not lookign up.

"I missed you too Aditi. Close your eyes. and go to sleep sweet heart.. am here now.. u'll be fine"

He rested his head on hers..

She drifted slowly into her sleep.. still feeeling the warmth of his embrace.. still listening to the splatter of water on the window panes...

Remebering 26/11 ....

2008-12-03T10:38:00.000-08:00

It has been a painful week. One week since Mumbai, one of the indomitable metroes in India, has been shaken by terror attacks. It pained every Indian to see those visuals in the TV sets which clearly potrayed a foiled Inteligence and security system, the insensitive political infra structure in one of the most respected countries. A bunch of young, below age of 25, so called "terrorists" walked into the busiest of the railway terminals in the country without a mere attempt to even hide their assualt guns! It was simply unbelievable that out Intelligence did not even have a clue about it. They carried guns and granades, started their killing spree created a whole 50Hr long terror situation in the whole city, took over 180 lives of innocent country men and a few of our foriegn guests and yet our state does not have an answer about it. Why is our political situation so numb? What are the so called "leaders" who were elected to power doing out there?

I noticed in one of the channels, someone, who had suffered personally in these attacks, mention that apart from her personal loss, what makes her low spirited, is the fact that people would soon forget this tragedy too.. they would forget those officers who fought till their death. Why did they afterall sacrifise their lives? I too silently agreed to this woman. I hoped, there is a change.

Today, I, like perhaps many other Indians, was infact a little relieved to see the kind of response from the country. One week after the tragedy, a simple sms could bring thousands of Indians on the streets of the metroes where they voiced their anger and frustration yet some hope and faith. As always Mumbai has regained its strength and is back. But this time, it not to forget things and move on but they say "Enough is Enough and we want some action!!" The time has come. We are not going to forget this too and claim "This happens!". There are so many things cropping up in the minds of every Indian. Even makes me seriously think, what can I, as an Indian, do to help make a difference. Something more than just writing a blog and expressing my despair.Perhaps make a sensible use of the right of vote I have as a citizen. I have never cast my vote till now, just because I did not have faith in the political structure. May be that could have made a difference too. Each one of us is now accountable for the kind of political situation we have in our country. Next time, I would definetly make better use of it, to help bring to power, someone sensible, someone with a vision for our country, someone who can make a differece. As a citizen, salute and admire the brave officers and soldiers instead of the movie stars and cricketers whom we preach. Hope and wish that our politicians wake up and do something for the country men, help atleast secure their lives. Pass this message to atleast few of my fellow beings to atleast pray for my country, pray for the return of the same nostalgic peaceful air in my country.

Jai Hind!

150 Things to do before you turn 30!

2008-11-21T10:36:00.000-08:00

Hello Again!! Sorry to come up with yet another stupid tag.! I just picked this post from another blog .. and this actually made me consious, that am too nearing the next big '0'.. and i still have loot more to do.. lot more.. A few would sound real wierd or crap, ignoring those, you could also do this list if you too find it interesting. ... and leave me a comment. The ones I have already done are in bold..

150 Things To Do Before You Turn 30

01. Bought everyone in the bar a drink
02. Swam with dolphins
03. Climbed a mountain
04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
05. Been inside the Great Pyramid
06. Held a tarantula
07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
08. Said “I love you” and meant it
09. Hugged a tree
10. Bungee jumped
11. Visited Paris
12. Watched a lightning storm at sea
13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise
14. Seen the Northern Lights
15. Gone to a huge sports game
16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
18. Touched an iceberg
19. Slept under the stars
20. Changed a baby’s diaper
21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
22. Watched a meteor shower
23. Gotten drunk on champagne (may not chanpagne though..)
24. Given more than you can afford to charity
25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment(happens so often with me..)
27. Had a food fight
28. Bet on a winning horse
29. Asked out a stranger
30. Had a snowball fight
31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
32. Held a lamb
33. Seen a total eclipse
34. Ridden a roller coaster
35. Hit a home run
36. Danced like a fool and didn’t care who was looking (On Stage!! can u believe that!! he he)
37. Adopted an accent for an entire day (I had adopted a strange mallu accent for almost 3 years..hope that counts!)
38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
39. Had two hard drives for your computer
40. Visited all 50 states
41. Taken care of someone who was drunk
42. Had amazing friends
43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country!
44. Watched whales
45. Stolen a sign
46. Backpacked in Europe
47. Taken a road-trip(So many ..and each one as special as the first...)
48. Gone rock climbing
49. Taken a midnight walk on the beach
50. Gone sky diving
51. Visited Ireland
52. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love
53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger’s table and had a meal with them
54. Visited Japan
55. Milked a cow
56. Alphabetized your CDs
57. Pretended to be a superhero
58. Sung karaoke (Quite a few.. latest I can remeber of is "Munbe Vaa..")
59. Lounged around in bed all day
60. Played touch football
61. Gone scuba diving
62. Kissed in the rain
63. Played in the mud
64. Played in the rain
65. Gone to a drive-in theatre
66. Visited the Great Wall of China
67. Started a business
68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
69. Toured ancient sites
70. Taken a martial arts class
71. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight - (whats D&D?)
72. Gotten married
73. Been in a movie
74. Crashed a party
75. Gotten divorced
76. Gone without food for 5 days..
77. Made cookies from scratch
78. Won first prize in a costume contest
79. Ridden a gondola in Venice
80. Gotten a tattoo
81. Rafted the Snake River
82. Been on a television news program as an “expert”(Does " pretending to be one "count?)
83. Gotten flowers for no reason.
84. Performed on stage
85. Been to Las Vegas
86. Recorded music
87. Eaten shark
88. Kissed on the first date
89. Gone to Thailand
90. Bought a house
91. Been in a combat zone
92. Been on a cruise ship
94. Spoken more than one language fluently
95. Performed in Rocky Horror
96. Raised children
97. Followed your favorite band/singer on their tour.
98.Passed out cold
99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking with the windows open
103. Had plastic surgery
104. Survived an accident that you shouldn’t have survived
105. Wrote articles for a large publication
106. Lost over 100 pounds(Wish i cld!!)
107. Held someone while they were having a flashback (and as they weeped!)
108. Piloted an airplane
109. Touched a stingray
110. Broken someone’s heart
111. Helped an animal give birth
112. Won money on a TV game show
113. Broken a bone
114. Gone on an African photo safari
115. Had a facial part pierced other than your ears
116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol
117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
118. Ridden a horse (Sat on it rather!!)
119. Had major surgery
120. Had a snake as a pet (WEIRD!!)
121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
122. Slept for 30 hours in a 48 hour period
123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. States
124. Visited all 7 continents
125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
126. Eaten kangaroo meat
127. Eaten sushi!
128. Had your picture in the newspaper
129. Changed someone’s mind about something you care deeply about (I wish i cld... )
130. Gone back to school
131. Parasailed
132. Touched a cockroach
133. Eaten fried green tomatoes
134. Read The Iliad and The Odyssey
135. Selected one “important” author who you missed in school, and read
136. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
137. Skipped all your school reunions
138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
139. Been elected to public office
140. Written your own computer language
141. Thought to yourself that you’re living your dream
142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
143. Built your own PC from parts
144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn’t know you
145. Had a booth at a street fair
146. Dyed your hair
147. Been a DJ
148. Shaved your head (yeah when I was an year old.. buhahaha!)
149. Caused a car accident ! (Splendidly well!)
150. Saved someone’s life

My fav soong... May be.. Just Mine!!!

2008-10-27T07:02:00.000-07:00

And yesterday I heard a new song. grabbed a new cd to write it . A new cd for a single song?? ooh.. what else would I write aloong with this.. ?May be the whole set of songs from the album.. The small display at the bottom corner of my laptop shows 10 am now.. OOps! I would just get this to write while I take a qwk shower.. No time to bother abt the rest of the songs.. let it be whatever crap.. just wanted this single song in there.. It was 10.35 while I was all dressed and ready.. water still dripping from my hair.. oohh .. I hate this.. never mind..no time to dry it off..will do it from office perhaps.. screen says project complete. grabbed the cd which was sticking out .. feeling pretty happy and contended..

All dusty car..was thinking to give it a wash today morning but was held up searching for sites to download the song.. never mind.. will compromise on my poise for today too.. there's always a tomorrow.. Took a qwk look around my house .. No lights glowing anywhere.. ok good.. i hope everything is done! Cd which I wrote (v.v.imp) Car key, Door keys, Bag with a comb(imp., I cld still feel the wet hair against my neck..sheeeek) purse, mobile, and mobile charger.. forgot to put it on charge late night.. that's it? alright.. threw all those into my car.. 2 empty bottles on the car seat and one on the floor. Wonder why I need so many bottles in here.. Oh Crap! My lunch box! Wouldn't have bothered to go bk and get it, if not for my lovely Mom who woke up soo early to make my lunch. Got my lunch box and a new bottle of water. That makes it 4 bottles in my car. Will surely clean it up tomorrow!!

Get Set Go! Took that new cd ... Or May be.. Not now!!!! Notice the fuel tank make a sad emoticon! oh! dear not now!!! But too risky to give it a chance, the indicator is struggling to fall further down. Target the nearest fuel station. 200 bucks is all I have as cash. Watch is already past 10.50. No time to swipe card. No probs will go with the 200Rs fuel. Hear my mobile ring in my bag.. Try to reach my bag at the back seat and pull it down the seat in my struggled attempt.. and now i could hear it ring from somewhere down the seat.. Oh God! No time to stop and search for my mobile..

I wonder why I always have soo much traffic on the roads..

can't these people be more cautious when they drive.

Half of them dnt deserve to ride on these roads.. Oooo.. Was that man on the bike staring at me?? May be I should slow down a bit until I get into the free way..

Better now! Hope to reach office by 11.30. My mobile still ringing from some where far down..

Reached office by 11.35 ... searched for my mobile .. 3 missed calls.. not surprised.. Ring back Prem as I grab my bag, and my mobile charger. Slipped my tag over. Prem cut the call, thank God he is in a call. Saved for now . Opps.. he is ringing back.. Pick it up as I hurry towards the rest room.

"Where the hell were you, and y didn't u pick up the phone".

"hey prem.. good morning have a nice day.. u know what, i've got a beautiful song for u today... was searching for it since morning" .

" u r such a jerk and where r u now Aditi ? "

"at the rest room.. willl ring you up in sometime alright"

"hmmm.. okie..am in a call.. ring me up later"

"alright.. byee"

"have a nice day"

was waiting for evening... but i hate waiting .. its half past 6 and i have been waiting for whole 10 mnts!! took my mobile and pressed the green bottom on the last dialled number and before I could utter anything..

"Just a couple of mnts more aditi .. am on my way"

"where r u now Prem, u have been on ur way since the past 10 mnts.. have u ever been on time and..dn't u know I..."

Beep..Beep..

alright.. there he is.. "sorryAditi, had a last min call.. . dnt worry they keep the plaza open till 8.. i will get u there before 7 .. okiee.. "

"hmmmm"

Got the cd out of my bag and slid into the player..

"I loved this sonngg.. my new fav soong... just listen okie.."

skipped the first few soongs.. till i heard my fav one.. I remember I played it atleast 3 times.. My fav soong.. and now Prem's too...

"Aditi wake up... we've reached the mall.. was way too busy traffic today...but u still have 30 mnts to do ur shopping and by the way, that was a beautiful soong... :) Loved it.. :)"

Perhaps the mobile ring woke me.. 1 missed call..

Don't know when i slept off..

A new chat window from Catherine blinked on the screen ..

"Hey Aditi, Heard you were not feeling well ... how are you feeling now.. grown pretty old is it .. 45 is still soo young as u say.. .. :) get well soon...

r u there Aditi?"

slothfully closed the chat window..

The song has stopped playing in my laptop..

Lovely song that was!!!!

could feel tears roll down my cheeks and they fell on the table...

My new fav soong.. may be...................................... ... May be ......... Just mine..

The Falls...

2008-10-08T16:41:00.001-07:00

My friend Binoj send me a link in orkut today, with the note : "your fav song- by one of your fav singers... :-) " . A very popular song of Sonu Nigam - Kal Ho Na Ho.. Remembered those old days, when my friends used to ask me to sing a soong and I always get sarted ... "hmmmmmmmmm har khadi badal rahi ......" eventually they added a clause.. "a soong , but please not, kal ho na ho again"... :) Those days, I guess, I picked up on this song, may be because I liked the mood and the music.. Today, when I heard it after sooo long, suddenly, made me feel different. Felt nostalgic and perhaps the song made more sense.

Life gave me little surprises at every phase... Least did it bother to give me a clue - "What Next!" Perhaps that was the gist of it all, which eventually taught me the very eloquent lesson of life.. This moment is the most special .. Life changes every second....each day.. And tomorrow perhaps you wouldn't get this moment yet again. Cherish ..live those special moments, live the wonderful today... There is something new for you tomorrow.

The leaves have started to change in my yard now. Red, Yellow, Orange .....Looks beautiful ...some are still green but they will probably change by next week... And I know, they'll all shed in a few days ... and in months will start afresh....for a brighter tomorrow.

"Har pal yahaan.. Jee bhar Jiyo.. Jo hein Samaa Kal Ho Na hoo.." Oh! guess i started it again..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l3fSlDG47rg&feature=related
Thanks my dear friend, I had a beautiful start of my day.